I did not grow up as a fan of Warriors, the series of middle-grade novels about fighting cats published by HarperCollins by the totally real not-a-pen-name author Erin Hunter. For most of my life, Warriors has been just one of many media franchises that I’ve been just…vaguely aware of. All of that changed just a few weeks ago, when for reasons I can’t fully explain, I decided to take the official “What Warriors Clan do you belong in?” quiz and got sorted into ShadowClan, which, at the time, I understood to be the Slytherin of Warriors, aka OntologicallyEvilClan. As someone who doesn’t consider himself to be particularly villainous, I immediately had to know: why was I assigned to ShadowClan? So I did the only logical thing – commit to reading the entire Warriors series until I find a satisfactory answer.

So, join my cat Zippy and me as we endeavor to immerse ourselves in the word of Warriors. Will it be good? Will it be bad? Will it be just kinda mid and forgettable? Let’s find out…

A Note on Chronology

The first several Warriors Roundup entries were originally posted as walls of text in a Discord server’s Off-Topic channel. For posterity, I have noted their original post date there at the bottom of their blog posts.